How to Stop Fighting Step #3 Break Down Misunderstandings -- Communicate Well

Option B. Listen First and then Respond

This response is right, but some ways of listening -- and responding -- are better than others.

One skill that helps prevent misunderstanding is called "active listening" or "empathic listening." To do this, the listener should:

Listen attentively:

• Don't listen with half of your brain, while planning your "comeback" (or your evening activities) with the other half of your brain.



• Listen not just to what they say, but try to understand why they are saying that -- place yourself "in their shoes."



• Test your understanding -- by repeating what you think you heard to confirm that you "got it right."



• Focus on feelings as well as substance.